I am not OK with where I am in my life right now.
I shouldn’t be going out. I shouldn’t be drinking. I shouldn’t be trying to force myself to forget because when I remember, it’s a shitstorm of horrible feelings.
I don’t know what I’m going to do about it. Maybe I’ll feel better tomorrow morning and maybe I’ll feel really better in three months and maybe finally, someday, I will be a whole, entire person again.
But right now? I am not being good to the people who are good to me. I am not worthy of the time and energy they have sunk in to trying to make me feel better. No one deserves me right now because I’m not a real person right now.
Get it together, lady.








