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reasons my downstairs neighbors may think i’m going through a rough time
- Nightly stumbling back and forth between my couch and the refrigerator.
- The amount of conversation that goes on between my dog and I.
- The two week stretches of me wearing pajamas exclusively, followed by one week where I try really hard to pull myself together in the morning.
- The Phantogram album that’s been on loop for the last week.
- The Friday last month where I got so drunk on expensive whiskey then sang Mariah Carey into the heater for an hour before getting up to vomit.
- The alarming lack of visitors.
- The incredibly long stretches of complete silence.
- The amount of swears I use in the shower.
- How I randomly scream, “CANCER!” to cope with my fear of it killing me.